Wednesday, June 03, 2009

PCFH


This book is one of the best books I have ever read. Honestly. It has changed my marital life more than anything, and all for the better.
About 6 months into my marriage, I realized it was not what I thought it would be. And so did he. It just wasn't the kind of marriage I (or he) wanted. We were miserable, but we didn't know why. He was explosively angry. I was a nag. Big time. I just didn't know how to get things done other than nag and nag, because otherwise he didn't respond. Things were bleak, and I felt trapped. As did he. We decided to get out, after months of trying and things just getting worse. I was falling apart. My boss at the time brought in The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands and told me it changed her marriage. I read it all in one sitting one sunday afternoon and cried my heart out. I started trying what this book told me to do. Trevor found an apartment and was moving out the next week. I had no idea what I was going to do. Within 4 days everything changed. Trevor cancelled the hold on that apartment. We felt happy again. This was finally what a marriage was supposed to be like! I'm not saying everything was perfect in 4 days. Old habits die hard. Many things had to be worked out and forgiven on both ends, but things did change and a huge burden was lifted off of us. Trevor's anger was gone because my nagging had ceased. I believe every woman, especially a married woman, needs to read this book! The funny thing is, I'm very much not a fan of Dr. Laura's, but I owe to her the success of my marriage, much of my individual happiness, and the fact that we went on to have the most gorgeous of baby girls. If you feel trapped, in a rut, or even perfectly happy, you have to read this book! What can it hurt?

6 comments:

Mark and Audrey said...

I have had this book sitting on my self for about a year now... I think maybe I might read it now! Thanks for sharing your story... I miss you so much!!!! give Allie hugs for me!

Alecia said...

wow!! yeah- I'm totally up for a book that will make my marriage better! Who isn't??

Ken said...

Hello... I often like to see what the blogs are saying about Dr. Laura (and other people and subjects) so I found your entry.

Just wanted to say that, as a husband, I have to say the book is great and it has helped my wife and I. That is one of the reasons I check out what is being said about Dr. Laura... her advice has improved my life.

Most men ARE simple creatures!

Every time I start to get negative feelings about what my wife is doing (or not doing) I catch myself and remind myself that she is not my enemy, but rather my best friend - and how can I make the situation better?

She tries to tell her callers (and readers) what they can do to make the situation better. That doesn't mean the other person, who is not reading or not calling, is in the right... but they aren't seeking Dr. Laura's advice.

Andrew said...

I had no idea you were having issues. I'm really glad that things are better between you and Trevor. Love yer face!

olivia (tringham) lyman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Patricia said...

Good thing you guys ended up with this book. For some reason the sister missionary who taught my parents the Gospel came to my wedding almost 2 years ago with this book and another one of Laura´s. I was barely married when I read this first one and was truly inspiring and prevented me from not nagging or having hard discussions with my husband that were going anywhere. Trevor is a good man, at least I can say he was a great missionary..If you ever think wrong about him, remember my words!!
Love ya guys!!